Many of us create a relationship to fulfil our needs and desires through the other. The very foundation being built on the feeling of “am incomplete”. This can at best be described as an arrangement of seeking oneself in the other.
If you are bored with yourself, how long can you be happy with the other or keep the other happy?
The honeymoon period when you can act to be made for each other soon ends and you start to come back to the being you were earlier. You have discovered the unknown for a brief while and now the mind wants to go back to the old ways.
So, you land up not liking or maybe hating your own creation. I hear people say “You have to work to make it happen” How do you do that? Or “You are no more the same you were before. You have changed”. Can you ever remain stagnant? Isn’t life about being more of you every day?
The mind has discovered what is and now yearns for more and that’s its inherent nature.
There are many who continue in a relationship because they created it and though unhappy about it are stuck with their own concepts. They linger on with the relationship and cut themselves out. It isn’t only one sided but both ways. This is a universal phenomenon of eliminating themselves yet putting a happy mask for the world. Getting out is just not an option.
Physical symptoms start to show up yet people put a brave face for the world and it is commonly referred to an old age disease. There are some who invite dis ease in their bodies to keep their partner to love them. There are others who suppress their own unique nature to fit in and these emotions come to light as physical symptoms. I wonder. Cutting their own awareness and being less of them with every passing day. Is this what life all about?
Seeking happiness outward at old age even though the senses have got exhausted. Now both are so in the web that neither staying in nor opting is a choice but life itself. This is the story of many we see around us.
There is always a choice.
It is always good to introspect and ask yourself. What would it take for this relationship to be a joyous experience?
There are whole lot of people who would like to be loved but are rejecting love energetically. Meditation clears the conflict of the mind.
Ask yourself, I am willing to receive love? Well, love itself has a billion definitions. What is your definition of love? When someone says “I love you” what do they really mean. The romantic someone special who is the whole package in one? Or the idea to keep the other person happy no matter what and divorce yourself? Or is it taking care of the other? Or evolving to being love and loving?
Committed to being you and being a contribution to the other can be a different experience altogether. Being embodied and exploring life together can be true joy. A person who is being a contribution is someone who contributes to your life out of choice, not obligation.
Life gives us endless possibilities every moment. What are you choosing together which enables you to evolve every single day? How are you choosing to live life to be more embodied?